In Recluse

[M'kel]

((Croooownnn, come visit dear M'kel XD))

Flashes of brown, blue, green, blurred forms flitting about at the corners of his vision. Then there were flames curling backwards towards him, and he was diving, away. Ash streamed into his face, the bitter taste of death, and they were whirling upward again. A scream above, as a dragon disappeared, didn't return, and the Thread that struck it was slipping past. Left, he thought, urging greater speed, and the bronze shaped curved sinuously in response, an extension of his own form, to open great jaws. And then blue, overwhelming blue, filling his vision, blocking out flames, Thread, and even Tirenth, his Tirenth...

And black. Then light. Then black again.

Tightly closed eyelids relaxed, slowly, and M'kel opened his eyes, gazing up at the nondescript stone roof above.

Tirenth had filled in the rest of the details for him. After they had struck Brell and Brueth, been struck in turn, M'kel had blacked out. Neither knew what had hit him, whether it had been limb, wing, or otherwise, but the blow to his head had sliced open his cheek, and the shock of it had left him reeling, slipping in and out of consciousness. Tirenth had immediately craned his head around, distraught at the sudden loss of their mental connection, to see what had happened to his rider. It was then that the erratic clump of Thread, unseen in the frenzy, had seared across his muzzle, and with a scream they had gone between.

When M'kel regained some semblance of consciousness, days later, he learned that Tirenth's injuries were far worse than his own. The bronze had been out of it nearly as long as he, but the pain kept awakening him. The Thread had wrapped itself full around his snout, and the bronze was struggling to open his mouth even enough to accept small pieces of meat. Even bathed in numbweed from nostrils to whirling eyes, the bronze felt the pain, and M'kel reeled from the force of it.

Of his own injuries, there was extensive bruising all along the side of his face, surrounding the vertical slash on his cheek. It was minor compared to some, but unlike Threadscore, the wound had been left open and bleeding. And he was in a similar position as his dragon, feeling the ache whenever he moved his own mouth, threatening to tear the wound back open.

It had been quite some time now, since then. The bruises had all but faded, and the gash was still bandaged, though mostly to keep it clean, for the scar was healing. Compared to others, he was not so bad. If he wanted, the Healers said, he could leave.

However, M'kel had insisted on staying, for Tirenth's sake, he said, so that the dragon had constant medical attention. Occasionally, the bronzerider would slip out, seek some peace and klah in the Lower Caverns, but mostly he was either lying on this cot or by his dragon's side.

In truth, he didn't want to go out there and face the Weyr again.

The 'Fall had been far worse than anyone could have predicted. And it was supposed to be sparse at the beginning of a Pass. So many injuries...both dragons and riders. Weyrlings, so freshly graduated, had lain around him on other cots. A few were still there. So young.

And they all blamed him. He knew they did. He should have prepared them better... So carefree, he had been. Nothing could touch him. A young Weyrleader, risen to rank in his dragon's first attempt at catching a gold.

So, M'kel was leaving it in the hands of others, for now. Let them solve the problems he couldn't. He was here for Tirenth, as long as his bronze needed him.

At the moment, the bronze was sleeping, so M'kel was reclining on his cot. Thinking. He did too much of that lately.

[.K.aci]

^{In order to have friendship you must look past the color to the soul,}

Swooping and swirling, the colors that flickered along black canvas taunted the girl. In quick succession they danced by, a rainbow of creation. With periwinkle blues and emerald greens, sandy browns and dusky bronzes, the colors stretched out and threatened to overwhelm her, teasing and mocking the girl. Fingers reached out, scrabbling through them, nails ripping through as easily as tearing through a veil. But they kept slipping back, the smaller pieces of her own making drifting down in front of her, fouling rushing feet as she struggled to get by.

She was looking for something, looking for? H'aze? D'rel? Where was K'mar? But no, they were content and happy now, she need not worry about them anymore. But what was she looking for then? The colors tortured her, seeming to laugh as they weaved faster, rushing up in a whirlwind around her. Opening her mouth, she gave a wordless cry and threw her hands up over her head, trying to protect herself.

Ezelth woke suddenly, her pale hide shivering. It took the young Gold a moment to find herself, and a moment more to find what had woken her. Claudia? Claudiamine? She could only murmur those words when Crown was asleep, or she could feel the girl shrink away from the contact that was constant in both their minds. The young Queen rose from her couch, edging closer to the girl. With her head cocked, she looked down on the young woman curled on her side, light strawberry blond hair curling softly down her face. Under the fur that covered her lower half, the usually still sleeper twitched and moved, eyes flickering nervously under closed eyelids. Her forehead - humans had such small features - was creased, different than the smooth look it usually took when she slept.

Heartlove? With a toss of her head, much like an anxious runner, the Gold gently stretched her neck across to daintily grab the edge of the fur, tugging it carefully up to cover Her's more closely. She froze at one point, sure that the sudden jerky movement meant that the girl was awake, but she only bit her lip and shivered violently. Letting go carefully, the anxiously whirling eyes looked at her Rider. Although the girl still shrunk away from her when the contact became to much, and they did not have the close bond that others had, she could feel the love that Her's had for her... It was hidden, yes, but there. If only there was a way for her to help her... Into the mind of the girl she delved, laying the serpentine body down next to the cot and ghosting through her dream.

A cry rent from her lips, but no, she couldn't call out for help, so she dug her teeth into her lips as the colors threatened to suffocate her... And then warmth, as a sudden new color entered. Even with her eyes closed, she could see this color, the creamy gold that that was sponged lightly over with a thicker honey color. This color was not threatening, instead slipping over her lightly, like a soft veil, and scaring the other colors away with it's proud aura. A coo escaped her lips, a soft sound, and she tucked herself deeper under the warmth it provided, knowing that she had somehow found it.

If only the realization would come to the girl in her waking moments.

It was busy outside the Weyrling Barracks, but Crown knew it would be. The Weyr was still recovering from their disastrous day at the hand of Thread, and everything was topsy-turvy because of it. Weyring Lessons had been sporadic, half because B'kay was still blind and very injured, and half because there was simply not enough hands to excuse the Juniors for any amount of time. With dragonets trailing along, they had all been sent off to help with something, often reverting back to their old Craft.

Except for her. She had gone from Drudge to Queenrider in only a few seconds, and the shift had changed the Weyr's view on her. Of course, she worked, but no one dared order her around anymore. It was a nice change, even if the reasoning was off color. "Ezelth, hurry up." The brusque command was softened as Crown's footsteps shortened, although she didn't look back at the serpentine dragon capering behind her. They had been near the lake, and the young soft colored gold was up to her shoulders in mud, the too long legs of a colt happily tossing up the mud and making her quite a spectacle. "The Healer's will have towels I can use to get the mud off of you; Faranth help me if I get in trouble because I've been "neglecting" you."

She had been carefully watched, Crown knew, her every movement evaluated. The Weyrwoman was not a nice lady, and with M'kel- don't think about it, she ordered herself sternly, slowly down more. Don't worry about him, he'll be fine. A soft nudge on her hand, and she looked down absent-mindedly, not realizing she had stopped moving. You can visit Tirenth's, Mine.[/color] The girl drew back mentally, flinching, but Ezelth ignored it and pressed on. He would like that.[/color] Crown shook her head, and began walking again. "And how would you know that?" The last time she had really talked to M'kel, he had had to treat her like a child, pushing her back towards the waiting Ezleth. I have spoken to Tirenth.[/color] Indeed, she had. Grateful that they had made Her's come back, she had thanked the great Bronze and spoken to him. Despite the pain he felt, on better days she had made friends with, confiding in him her fears as Crown fought their Bond.

"You've spoken to him?!" The Gold shook her head and hurried forward, dancing around the girl. You know that, Mine.[/color] "Stop calling me that." It is not as if you did not know.[/color] A little shamefaced now, Crown ducked her head. She had known that Ezelth was talking to Tirenth, but she had tuned out her dragon on those occasions. "Still, I doubt M'kel would want to see me. He's better things to do with his time." Ezelth looked back, dragon-frowning. Tirenth said His has not moved from his side.[/color] Crown blinked at the dragon, confused. Hadn't be better things to do? The Weyr needed him, and Tirenth was getting better...

Ezelth had a plan then, as she watched Her's frown. Tirenth had said that His needed company, and he liked Her's... Her's was worried about His, and maybe something good would come of it! With a new tinge of happiness whirling in her eyes, she turned to Crown. Come! I need this mud off of me.[/color] Crown rolled her eyes at the sudden fickleness, but hurried her step.

Into the Healer's Cavern they went, Ezelth a few paces ahead of her rider. Behind her, Crown couldn't help but admire the young Gold. She was the prettiest picture, head held high and proud. She was the biggest in their class, but smaller that she remembered the Queen's from the previous clutch. It didn't matter. She was more graceful then them, with the coltish look about her she was sure to grow into. So busy admiring her, Crown didn't realize that she had stopped at a door, and was looking at her Rider with a gentle amusement. Blushing, she frowned and opened it, walking in quickly - and freezing. Ezelth had walked her right into M'kel's room, and by the contentedness in her mind, she had planned this.

Ready to spin around, she realized she couldn't - Ezelth had placed herself in the doorway, and she gave a quiet draconic cough to draw his attention to them. Her hands on her hips, she turned back around to face M'kel, muttering, "I will get you for this later, Ezelth." Slightly louder was the, "Hello Weyrleader."

Because within the soul _lies a rainbow of many colors.

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[M'kel]

Dark images of Thread-wounded dragonriders, their eyes full of accusation and pain, flashed through his mind. He could already hear the whispers behind him, the malevolent mutterings that the Weyrleader had failed them. Failed them all. And that something must be done. He must be removed, before the innocent suffered more.

The bronzerider had few friends at this Weyr, ambition having distanced him from comrades and Weyrmate alike. He took his pleasures, true, but there weren't many who felt any lasting attachment to him. And that was the way he'd liked it: young and free, desired and desirous. And yet only now was he beginning to realize just how alone he was. Only Tirenth was there, when the sky had turned black with the grit of burning Thread and hides alike. Only Tirenth had forgiven him, and he deserved his dragon's forgiveness least of all. It was M'kel's fault that the dragon had let down his guard, turning to check on his semi-conscious rider. The bronze may have forgiven him, but the bronzerider had far from forgiven himself.

He was mired quite deeply in this dark, dark reverie when the sudden opening of his door jolted M'kel back to Pern. Startled, his head jerked 'round, body stiffening, as he sat straighter and regarded this intrusion on his thoughts. For a moment, he only stared, failing to recognize the frail form before him. Absently, his hazel eyes drifted downward to a muddied, yet visibly golden form, and a spark of realization flared in his otherwise bleak gaze.

"Crown." He spoke the name before even raising his eyes again, as if it was drawn out of him without thought. Solely instinctive. So, he thought dimly, he had a visitor at last.

A moment longer, he studied the girl. She had changed so much since her days as a drudge, it was no wonder he'd found her momentarily unrecognizable. It wasn't as if she'd aged in the many sevendays since then, but the way she carried herself, already fierce and proud in those days, was more pronounced. It wasn't that she had grown haughty with this new rank, no...there was just something right about her features, as if this was who she was meant to be all along.

Realizing that the silence had stretched for some time, M'kel dipped his gaze, glancing at golden Ezelth once more. It seemed very strange to have a conversation, after his long, voluntary solitude. He hardly knew where to start.

Somehow, though, dragons always seemed to solve those nuisancy human problems.

"Still rolling about in the mud, are you?" he inquired, a slow smile lighting his features as his eyes returned to the girl's. "I thought you'd found our last foray in the Lake a bit more than you'd been looking for." M'kel gestured slightly in Ezelth's direction, indicating his reference to the gold's hide, in case the girl misunderstood his obscure remark.

It wasn't as bad as he'd expected, the Weyrleader decided. It was easy to slip back into his old playfulness, even if his heart wasn't as in it as it used to be.

[.K.aci]

<sup>The thing that startled her the must - it most defiantly was that he never looked at her. It was down at the graceful.... Yet very muddy gold, and then he said her name, without ever seeing her. He looked at her, sure, but those eyes stayed distant. 'Crown.' The word was rolled around on the tongue, tasted first, before he looked back up at the girl who stood with her arms on her hips, giving him a wary glance. But he stayed quiet, and so she followed suit. It was slightly awkward, the silence as he seemed to just look at her... But she was far to proud to ever lower her eyes and prove the submission that lurked, instead thrusting her chin up and matching him eye for eye.

He looked different. Not very different, she realized as she idly ran a hand through the short strawberry blond hair, not different in looks... It was the way that he was. He no longer was the confident arrogant man that she had met before, slightly harried and amused at the world, too sure in his position and with his life. He had the manner of a defeated man, the hollowed mien of one who had been conquered be the world. He had seen the way of the people, and finally the young man had somehow... Matured. It was not the best way, and it was cruel, but he had grown up. Suddenly, she wished that she could go over and give him a hug. The poor Weyrleader looked miserable.

'Still rolling about in the mud, are you?' The sentence was so abrupt, so out of the blue, she actually started. A slim eyebrow went up, looking at the man as though he might be loosing his mind... Until Ezelth's dry chuckle ran through her mind. 'I thought you'd found our last foray in the Lake a bit more than you'd been looking for.' She stiffened for a moment, not quite sure to take offense or not. But instead, as Ezelth's gentle prodding's shoved her mentally forward, she lifted a lip delicately and sneered at him, bright blue eyes dancing. "If I remember correctly, I was helping you scrub your dirty dragon. Hello Tirenth, by the way! I hope you are feeling better."

Hello Tirenth. I echo Mine when I hope that you are feeling better? The serpentine little Queen delicately stepped around Her's to glide over to the Weyrleader, streaching out her nose and sniffing him before sneezing gently. Shaking her head, she continued around the man to where she could settle down into a crouch near the Bronze. And I hope that Your's is feeling better also.</sup>[/color]

The girl had mostly been ignoring Ezelth's wanderings, used to the Gold doing whatever she wanted. She had taken that time to slide to the floor, leaning back against the wall with her hands tucked into the to-big breeches pockets. Now she regarded the man, idly gnawing on her lip. She had changed little since Impressing, unless you counted the slight hardening of her eyes. That meant that the way she opened her mouth and shoved her foot in stayed the same, so out came the words, "Why are you hiding?" Ezelth's head whipped around to look at Her's, only slightly shocked, but embarrassed. Crown-Mine! You have no better way of saying that?[/color] The girl ignored her disgruntled dragon and slouched lower on the wall, looking at his face with her somber gaze. "It's not doing you any good."[/sup][/size]

[M'kel]

A very familiar look overtook the girl's face at his remark, and M'kel couldn't help but grin at the response he had succeeded in eliciting. Her indignant retort caused his grin to lessen slightly; it was so far from amused that it seemed wrong to continue smirking so. That was somewhat reassuring, however; her sense of humour hadn't changed, even if everything else in this world had.

"That's true," he admitted slowly, watching the little queen as she moved gracefully towards him. "Although you did seem to enjoy it for the most part..." He decided to omit the part where she had almost drowned. That may have put a bit of a damper on the experience.

The activity so nearby had gradually roused Tirenth from his slumber, and he had opened one whirling eye just in time to be greeted. The bronze rumbled drowsily in response to Crown, closing a few lids again as he considered falling back to sleep. However, another voice interrupted that idea, and both eyes opened this time. He hadn't noticed the sleek little gold originally but was not quite attentive to her presence.

Good day, Ezelth. I am feeling quite better, actually. I'd leave today, if they let me. The meticulousness with which Tirenth shifted his head, however, belied these airy words. Mine's pride is hurt more than anything, I believe. Your inquiry is appreciated, though. He paused, considering the young gold. How have you and yours been? he asked more softly, remembering the first time he had met this newly shelled young one.

Having turned to watch the young queen go by, M'kel slowly rotated back to face Crown. Her new position, on the floor, caused him to raise a querying brow, and her question froze that expression in place. For a few moments, he did nothing but stare at her. His hazel eyes held a flicker of a hunted look. His gashed cheek nearly twitched with the effort of revealing as little as possible of his internal upset.

A forcedly cheery smile wrenched its way onto his face. "I don't know what you're talking about. Tirenth needs me. I'm here for him." It was an easy plea to make, as any dragonrider would understand the need to be with his/her dragon when that dragon was in pain.

And yet it was so clearly a lie. He could easily tend to his dragon's needs while still venturing out in the Weyr on occasion. She knew that.

Thus, more quietly, M'kel asked, "What are they...saying about me? Out there?"

[.K.aci]

It seemed he took the greatest pleasure in teasing her, and the young girl childishly stuck her tongue out as he grinned... But she was still happy she could elicit a smile from him. He looked like he didn't smile enough anymore. Well, he had the decency to stop smiling a little less, but suddenly the satisfaction that she would have generally gotten at that point shriveled up and died. She needed him to smile - it seemed he needed it more than Ezelth had made out. Mine - Stop calling me that - I made it out more. You just need to listen! It was an argument for another time, but she knew that Ezelth was right. If she had listened, maybe she could have cheered up M'kel a little more. Fine. You were right. It was better than nothing, the little Queen knew, so she took her satisfaction and made no qualms of hiding it. It was a needle in Her's side, and in the silent war they waged it was a well struck blow.

'That's true. Although you did seem to enjoy it for the most part...' She wanted him to smile again, and so she nodded, pretending solemnness. "I did... Drowning was my favorite part, you know." It was said with a straight face and a serious nod, as she tried to imitate the older Lord Holder she had known at one point. "Well, of course, next to getting to admire Tirenth up close and personal, and getting me out of chores..."

Good day, Ezelth. I am feeling quite better, actually. I'd leave today, if they let me. Mine's pride is hurt more than anything, I believe. Your inquiry is appreciated, though. How have you and yours been? The Gold watched the Bronze with her own serious air, watching as he carefully moved, and decided not to insult him anymore. You are looking much better. The next part of his statement was easy to reply to. Yes - I have found that human's seem to be very prideful. She broadcasted the last part out to the girl sitting on the floor, but Her's only ignored it, and she turned back to Tirenth with an expelled breath. But the last part... She herself was a hypocrite - she wouldn't accept help from anyone. Her's was Her's - she would find a way to be like all of her siblings, cuddled next to Their's with a bond to be envied.We are... Fine. Yes, that was the word to use. Fine enough.

The next part of the conversation was more interesting for her though, and she rose her own slender, almost invisible brow as she watched. He looked as though she had released canines after him, hunting him down through a precarious chase as he tried to school his face into stillness. That was why she didn't bother easing into things - you learned so much more when anyone wasn't expecting anything. 'I don't know what you're talking about. Tirenth needs me. I'm here for him.' Both eyebrow's were in the air now as he spoke, and she nodded encouragingly. "Uh huh." And then Crown used her brain, for once. Instead of saying and you are a worst liar than I thought, she only nodded and smiled a slow, melancholy smile at him as she leaned her head back against the wall and waited.

'What are they...saying about me? Out there?' She winced - her face was not nearly as good as hiding her expressions. "Errm, well." What would you say to that? What the Weyr was thinking wasn't something to be said outloud, by her. She didn't have a knack for making things nicer... She was too blunt. "Alright..." She bit on her lip, and then decided that the only thing he could need was the truth. "They think that you aren't doing the right thing. I'm not a spy for you, M'kel - this is just what I've heard, and I'm only saying this because I think you might need to hear it. They think that you haven't done as good as a job as you might have... They think that the cocky and brash Weyrleader has been brought down a few rungs, but the price was too high." She stayed silent for a few minutes, looking down at clasped hands before shaking her head and rising. "Well, that's what they say. But... I think they might be wrong. You tried your hardest - it's that d**n Weyrwoman's fault, jumping ahead too soon. You gave your best, and your Wing certainly did a good job... But it wasn't good enough this time."

She gave him a small smile, her tirade coming to an end as she waited for a response... That would never come. Ezelth looked up suddenly, telling her, Weyrling lesson's start very soon - we must go. Goodbye Tirenth - please do not loose hope. It was a kind goodbye, and she inclined her head to M'kel as she came to shepherd Her's out the door. Crown didn't want to leave - M'kel still looked so upset! But she had too, so, "Alright, I'm going. Weyrling lessons... I'll come visit again... Don't take what I said too hard please." And then she was pushed right out of the door, thinking too much about what people were like to really get anything out of the lesson that day.